If it makes you happy...

I was going to write an extremely depressive post as this was the mood I was in. I am unhappy about my job and unhappy about the place I live in (what's left?) but instead of rambling again about my discontentment, I decided to write what would take to kick me off of that mood pronto. Wine. There.

Not only wine, alcohol. I'm by no means an alcoholic, but I am a wine specialist and a true wine lover. I think europeans have a better relationship with wine as not only a food enhancer, but a life enhancer.

I fell in love with wine earlier than I should admit, I was a teenager. I never got drunk, but I got numb.How wonderful that feeling...when your problems appear diminished and your anxieties become blurred.

 How fantastic is to giggle with your friends all afternoon over a bottle of champagne; how delicious is a cold beer in a very hot weather, or happy-hour cocktails after a hard day of work, how gorgeous is a bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon over dinner with your steak.

Now people like to point out to me that alcohol is poison. And quoting Frank Sinatra, they say alcohol is men's enemy but the bible told us to love our enemies. Joking aside, I kind of feel sorry for people who feel sick or depressed with alcohol. That never has been the case for me. It makes me happy (not to mention funnier, more sincere, braver and a better lover)

I do believe in drinking with moderation, and I never craved cigarette or drugs, but I hold an altar to Bacchus. And the more I know about it, the more I appreciate it and the more it fascinates me. Maybe it will slightly shorten my life, but when I look back and remember the champagne euphoria, I know it will be all worth it.

By the way, I am completely sober whilst writing this.

winetastingspeedating

I had an offer to do a Wine Tasting- Speed Dating thing a little while ago. I had mixed emotions about this: I wanted to do wine tastings but wasn't sure about the speed dating part. Somehow it cheapened it. It made the tasting seem like just an excuse for the dating. A topic of conversation, perhaps. Or just a way to get drunk faster and avoid the sheer embarrassment of talking about yourself to so many different strangers .

But I said alright, I will do it. It might be fun. It might give me confidence. I might do some networking.

Then the organizer, Anna, asked me to go on Friday (the 30th) and meet James, who would give her feedback about me, and Tom - who was also going for a trial.

I found out Tom and James were actors. And almost didn't go because of that. Why? Because I've never been much of an extrovert. I'm highly critical and I always feel silly trying to be funny and entertaining to a crowd of strangers. I'm funny and entertaining with my good friends only. And actors are...well, how can I explain?

 They are very vocal, they can pull every expression and impression needed, even if they are not confident they will ooze confidence...because they are actors. Therefore I was insecure, I didn't want to be evaluated or compared to an actor. I called my friend and she told me that there wasn't a moment in my life that I didn't look secure, that I always look like I am in control. And many people have told me that (Sometimes mentioning intimidating and arrogant as well.  Haha).

Right, I went there, met James, who was a very lovely Scottish guy (of course they would listen to him! Scottish accent is just adorable) and Tom, who is English and a truly nice guy as well.

I had the best time I have ever had whilst working. Seriously, get paid for that? To talk to people, to taste wines, to be around funny interesting colleagues? Beats waking up early to sit in front of a computer all day, don't you think?

So I took two lessons from Friday: One is that as soon as I can I will be my own boss, because teaching wines and interacting with people is what I love. And second is that I will never ever let an opportunity pass because of fear or insecurity.